Dear Tank


Dear Tank

You’re only a month old, almost five weeks. They have been the shortest, sweetest five weeks of my life.

You have no idea how nervous your daddy was about you coming. We realized on our honeymoon that it wasn’t wedding nerves messing up my cycle. We’d only been married 7 months when you made your appearance.

Sweetie, he’ll argue it but I’m sure your dad was so nervous about having a baby that you still didn’t have a name until the week before your were born. Daddy refused to even discuss names until May (you were born in June).

Because your sister refused to come the natural way, the doctors wouldn’t risk it with you. As they prepared me for surgery the nurse handed your daddy a pair of scrubs so he could come with me. The scrubs were too small. I could see that easily but your daddy was so nervous he didn’t realize it until he was trying to put them on. I laughed so hard watching him try to fit himself into a medium shirt. When he finally realized the problem he turned to the nurse and says “um.. I haven’t been a medium since elementary school”. They brought him back a 3x!

In the operating room your daddy sat next to me still obviously nervous. I was numb from the chest down, awake and about to be cut open so they could go in after you, and daddy was the nervous one. I even had to ask him to hold my hand. I needed to feel his touch.. he needed to see if you were really in there.

Be prepared, daddy’s favorite story is that the moment they pulled you out you peed on mommy’s doctor and a nurse. Then you peed on the nurse they handed you to to get cleaned up.

They handed you to daddy, and you could see all his nerve melt away and this look of joy filled his face. He showed you to me, and then took you back to my room and called and texted everyone we knew. Only day in history daddy was more connected to social media than mommy.

I’ve watched you grow now for a month, and I can’t wait to see the man you become.

I’m going to tell you many of the same things I tell your sister, but there are a few that are just for you.

1.) Never start a fight — I say this instead of don’t fight because if someone threatens you or your sister, or your future girlfriend or wife, then by all means fight. Defend yourself. Stand your ground. You don’t need to fight to be a man, but sometimes as a man a fight is necessary.

2.) No matter where life takes you — Call me — Calling mommy doesn’t make you a wuss, it means you care enough about you mama not to make her worry.

3.) Treat ALL women with respect — An honorable man is kind and courteous to women. That’s not to say you need to stay with a woman who doesn’t treat you with respect, but after you break up with her, don’t bad mouth her. Forgive her, and move on with your life. Dwelling on such negativity can ruin future relationships.

4.) Wait — having sex doesn’t make you a man, it makes you sexually active. Wait for the woman you’d be willing to marry. If she’s not someone worth such a commitment then she’s not worth giving up the piece of your heart sex will take from you.

5.)Pray – prayer does great things. I told your sister that having God in your life doesn’t make life easy, just easier to deal with. Life still has it’s highs and lows, mountains and valleys so to speak. Letting God be your center and your guide will make the low points easier to bare.

6.) Keep faith – faith can move mountains (matthew 17:20). I pray as you grow that you will come to know God and let him lead your life, let Him encourage your growth and influence your choices.

7.) Laugh – laughter can heal even a broken heart. Do not let life become so serious that you forget how to enjoy it. — “What does it prosper a man to gain the whole world but lose his soul?”

8.) Be Careful – the company you keep will influence what others think of you. It will also influence your choices. As I told your sister, Gigi gave me advice as a teenager that has guided much of my life. “Never do anything you would be ashamed to tell you parents or your pastor about”.

9.) Moderation – I’m not going to tell you not to drink. Once you’re of age i’m sure you’ll try it (i hope not before hand). However you don’t need alcohol to have fun. It makes people vile and sick. The craziest and best times i have ever had, even in college, i had sober. You don’t need it.

10.) Learn – never cease to learn. Be curious, forever exploring and discovering new things. Expand your horizons and feed your mind your entire life.

My sweet baby boy, there is a part of me that isn’t ready for you to grow up. It feels like just yesterday your sister was your size and would sleep on my chest, and now as i hold you I wish to keep you that way forever.

And then I look at your father. You are his mini-me, and I can’t wait to see if you become the same incredible man your father is. I am truly blessed by my entire family. We are all better because you are here.

I love you! We all love you!


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