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Being a Good Friend After Becoming a Mother

Surprise Sunday

 

It’s no secret, I am a mom.  These are my children….

 

park fun

 

They keep my life interesting. I spent most of my evening returning MY tennis shoes back to where they belong because my son feels the need to bring them from the doorway to the dining room and place them on the dining room table.  My daughter was a little more subdued and spent the night coloring (she loves art).

What I am realizing is that I am a horrible friend. I feel guilty having to share my attention between my friends and my children and so often I shy away from gatherings where that is needed.  That normally means if I have my children (ie. they are not home with their father or off with their grandparents) I tend to neglect my friends.

Sometimes I have gatherings at my house and my friends come, and I don’t feel as guilty because this is where my kids live and they should here.  But that isn’t fair to my friends either.

I know I need that adult interaction, but, as my husband tells me, I’m not good about asking for help.  I get it stuck in my head that is is my responsibility,  and I suck it up and I try to take care of it.  I feel guilty even asking my in laws (my kid’s grandparents) to babysit because they’re my kids, they’ve all ready raised their kids and shouldn’t have to take care of mine.

They offer a lot, and I normally take them up on the offer.  I don’t have a problem accepting help, It’s just hard for me to ask for it.  I always feel like i’m shirking my responsibilities when I do.

Isn’t it lazy to ask someone else to do something that I can do?

But how much longer can I do it myself? How much longer can I take on the world before I crash and burn?

How do I balance work, being a wife,being a mother, taking care of the house, having time for myself and still being the friend i should be for my friends?

I have some wonderful friends who are very understanding.  They were supportive of me when i was a single mother, they celebrated with me when I got married and added another child to my family, and it feels like sometimes the best I can do is give them a facebook shout out.

That’s not a good friend.  I miss making connections with people.  Being online keeps people in contact but not connected.

I know I have lost friends after becoming a mother.

Some could not handle that my life was different.  That I wasn’t free to go out at nine when they called at eight.

Some, we just drifted apart. They began a family of their own, or moved away, or they put the same energy into advancing their careers as I have put into caring for my family.  That is the nature of life.  Not all friendships last forever.

But the friends I still have are special, and I feel like I am neglecting them.  I hate that feeling.  But I don’t want to neglect my family either and I know I can’t do it all.  So what gives?

 

Hey moms!  

How do  you balance all of this?  

How do you make time to still be a good friend while still being a good mother?

Am I the only one who struggles with this?  

Leave me a comment and give me some advice!

 

 
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Posted by on July 28, 2014 in Parenthood

 

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Weird Al Strikes Again

Silly Saturday

 

 

Recently parody genius, Weird Al Yankovic added a bunch of new songs to his repertoire.  As always they have become instant hits.

I decided for this “Silly Saturday” to share my favorite Weird Al songs, including two of the new ones that I think just about everyone loves.

 

Amish Paradise

 

The Saga Begins

White and Nerdy

Word Crimes

Foil

 

What is your favorite Weird Al song?

Share by leaving a comment!

 
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Posted by on July 26, 2014 in Funny

 

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Kindergarten is Coming

Family Friday

 

 

She wore only a diaper and laid comfortable against my chest, slightly tucked inside my nightgown as I sat on the hospital bed still hooked up to machines.

I had had an severe allergic reaction to the bandaging used after my c-section, but that didn’t matter.  This little girl against my chest, all 7 lbs 11 ounces of her, was now my life.

I was now a mother and this was the greatest title I could ever take on in my life.  I was now responsible for a life beyond my own.

That was almost five years ago.

Ewok

Now we are not only approaching her fifth birthday, but she will be starting kindergarten at the end of August.

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I am amazed at the young lady she has become. She talks.  Oh, she can talk.  But she has a vocabulary you would never imagine from a child so young.  She uses words like “trepidation” properly.  She has also mastered the art of sarcasm… this could cause a problem.

She loves dancing, tumbling and soccer. She wants to get more into swimming and gymnastics. She loves music (we’re still not sure if she sings like me or like my grandma – if you know us you know the spectrum that is).  She wants to learn to play guitar. She loves art and has said that she would like to be an artist when she grows up and be a children’s book illustrator.  Maybe one day I will write a book and she will draw the pictures.

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She is incredibly compassionate.  This past week I donated blood to the Red Cross.  I’m not sure she completely understood what I was doing.  After they hooked me up she came and handed me her beloved teddy bear and told me she hoped I would feel better soon.

She has an infectious personality. It is hard not to smile when she is around.

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I am incredibly proud of the young lady my baby girl is becoming.  But as she nears her fifth birthday and the start of kindergarten, I struggle with being ready to let go of my baby and embrace my young lady.

I still see the tiny baby. I still see the little girl who would stand up from the middle of the floor and the when she lost her balance wouldn’t fall on her bottom but instead slid slowly to the ground using her face (she spent a good two months with rug burns on her face while learning to walk).  I still see the tiny girl who would stand in front of the alter while I helped prepare music for church.

And now standing before me is not a baby or toddler, but a girl. A girl who will grow faster than I am ready to accept. A girl with her own passions and interests.  I know I will always see that baby even when I watch her graduate from high school I will still hear in my mind her saying “uh oh, it dips-appeared” when something was no longer where she left it.

Where I once held a baby… I now have a beautiful, passionate, compassionate, wonderful young lady.

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Posted by on July 26, 2014 in Family Fun, Parenthood

 

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Learning to Wait

Bible Thought Thursday

 

How long, O LORD- Will you forget me

 

I almost giggled at this verse. It seems melodramatic. it sounds like my preschoolers in the midst of a tantrum.

 

I’m going to my room and I’m not coming out FOREVER!

 

And yet, this was David, a man after God’s own heart, and here he was, like a child demanding what he wanted from God – Now!

How often do we as adults find it difficult to wait on things – the cashier at the market, your child getting dressed on a busy morning, a red light at an intersection.  We live in a world of instant gratification and we expect God to work the same way.

We ask, he gives, life is good. But we see the now, and he sees the full picture. And yet, we feel as though we have been forgotten, unloved, when he does not give into our desires the instant we express them.

Patience is not an easy thing to learn.  Not with traffic, in lines, with (or for) our children, or even with God.

God’s plans are so much greater than our desires. And when we trust in his goodness and love and wait on him, we will see the blessings of God.  Maybe not in the way we desire, but so much more than we could have ever imagined.

That is the thing, what we thin we need now, God knows if we get it we will miss something greater later on.  He shows us great love in not giving into our demands, but holding out for what is best for us.

 

 

But I trust in your unfailing

 

 

 

Lord;

I thank you that you do not give me all I desire, but you do give me all that I need. I will trust in your providence – take hope in your mercy – and find peace in your unfailing love.

~ Amen

 

 

Have you ever experienced God’s love in his silence?

 

Please share by leaving a comment

 

 
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Posted by on July 26, 2014 in Devotionals

 

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Deer Visitors (Wordless Wednesday)

Wordless Wednesday

 

 

 

Deer Visitors

 
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Posted by on July 24, 2014 in Photography

 

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Planning for the New School Year

Teacher Tuesday

 

 

 

Planning for the School Year

 

It’s that time of year!  It’s time to start thinking of classroom arrangements and *gasp!* LESSON PLANS!  This year to save money, I didn’t buy a planner, I created one for myself and personalized it so it would be best used for my classroom.

My planner is separated into

  • Circle Time
  • Phonics
  • Reading
  • Numbers
  • Language Arts (Literature/ Reader responses)
  • Language Development (Vocabulary, Spelling, and Writing)
  • Art/Music/Drama
  • Science/Social Studies

And then I left a space for notes

I do believe you can edit my categories to fit your needs.

 You can find my Lesson Planner here.

For long range planning (monthly themes) I also created a Long Range Planner that worked for me.  It is a blank template so maybe it will work for anyone else who would like it.

You can find my Long Range Planner here

 

I have not had the time to make myself a grade record book so I went searching online and I have to say donnayoung.com (for home schoolers) is a great resource for grade recorders.  I chose to use her 10 Subject grade keeper.  I love it because you use one page for each student, you can keep grades for every subjects on that page and it is set up in a way where at a glance I can watch progress throughout the year, there isn’t any flipping pages to see if said student is doing better this semester as compared to last, it’s all on that one page for the THAT student.

If you would like to check out the Donna Yong Grade Recorder you can do that here

I hope this helps with your planning!

Share with me by commenting if there are any online resources that you love when planning for the next school year.

 
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Posted by on July 22, 2014 in Teacher Corner

 

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Crock Pot Venison Loin (Recipe)

Meal Plan

 

Cheesy Baked Tomatoes

 

crock pot venison loin

 

 

Ingredients

  • 1 lb Venison Loin
  • 1/2 Cup Apple Cider Vinegar
  • 1 Cup Water
  • 1/8 Cup Steak Sauce (I use A-1)
  • 1/8 Cup Oil (I use Canola Oil)
  • Onion Powder
  • Garlic Powder
  • Basil
  • Oregano
  • Cajun Seasoning

 

Directions

  • In a large bowl mix the apple cider vinegar, water, steak sauce and oil. Set this aside
  • In another bowl mix onion powder, garlic powder, basil, oregano, and cajun seasoning.
  • Roll Venison Loin in liquid mixture and then rub down with spice mixtures.
  • Place Venison Loin in Crock pot, add liquid from liquid mixture and extra spices from dry rub
  • Set Crock pot on high for four hours

 

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To make dinner even better I made a compound butter mixture of butter basil and garlic powder and let it rest in the refrigerator.  I mixed this in to both our mashed potatoes and mixed veggies.

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In the end dinner tasted really good, but my daughter felt there was too much garlic in the potatoes and mixed veggies (something she normally eats a lot of); so if you have young children I would suggest going easy on the garlic powder in the butter compound.

 

This was dinner…..

 

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Posted by on July 22, 2014 in Recipes

 

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